Q&A: Should I Tell My Husband I Am Gay?

Should I Tell My Husband I Am Gay?

We got married seven years ago after dating for just four months. I was in my early 20s, a virgin, without any sexual experience and I thought my attraction to women was a phase that I would get over once I started having sex with a man. Unfortunately, that didn’t happen, and I’ve been repressing my desires ever since.

I genuinely love and care for my husband, he’s my best friend and the father of my children, we have built a family, a home and a life together. I would never walk away from him, we still have sex 2-3 times a week which is a lot after seven years and two kids. I do enjoy having sex with him. Physically it feels good, and it’s the only kind of sex I know. Initially, I had vaginismus, a psychological condition where the vagina muscles tense up, but I’ve learnt to relax. We do most things in bed but the act that makes me the most uncomfortable is kissing. I’ve never enjoyed kissing, especially passionate open-mouth kissing. When he initiates a kiss, I try to turn away or close my lips or let him kiss me while I think of something else. He has noticed this, but I’ve just told him that I don’t like to be kissed on the lips. This is the only thing that I dislike… I actually enjoy or don’t mind the other parts of our sex life.

Lately, I’ve been more and more curious about what it would be like to be with a woman. It’s a longing almost. I want to find the woman of my dreams, yet I don’t want to give up the life I have with my husband. I want to stay with him, I want to keep having sex with him, but I want to see other women.

I’m not bisexual, I’m 99% gay. I haven’t been attracted to men other than my husband, and my attraction to him only slowly developed over the course of many months.

I’m worried about how he would respond. I don’t want him to think that I’ve been deceiving him all this time or that I’m not attracted to him or that I’m going to leave him. I’ve thought about telling him that I’m bisexual and want to explore my attraction to other women in real life, which he can handle I think. Or should I just tell him the truth.. that I’m gay and have always been this way?

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Top 30 NSFW Sub Reddits (You’re Welcome)

It is well known that the internet was created for nothing other than porn and all the other unimportant things, such as information, just kind of fell into place. The unsung hero of the internet’s true purpose is its powerful reach when it comes to pushing the boundaries of smut itself. One of the best purveyors of NSFW content you won’t find anywhere else is Reddit.  The best NSFW Reddit combines sex appeal with niche fetishes and kinks, celebrates body positive, and even delves into the surreal. Our list of those communities shines a light on some of the darkest, most perverted, and most popular spots on the internet.

We have our own naughty selfie section for those interested in seeing what we look like and share online.  Or you can play “Where’s Waldo” and find us posting on these naughty nsfw sub reddits below!


 

r/sex

Probably the main subreddit we browse.  We enjoy the witty comments, open-minded sexual questions, and enjoy reading various talk about random people’s sex life. It’s kind of what we do with our blog right?  We ourselves have posted on this subreddit numerous times, been called “trolls” because some of our adventures seem unreal to some users, and also have been complimented.  No hard feelings, we are real and we love this the r/sex sub reddit!  

r/normalnudes

The real MVP.  Men and women a bit self conscious about their bodies ask for feedback from the internet.  Protected by mods so you cannot troll or be mean, so it’s extremely body positive and fun to look at!  Enjoy.

r/gonewildhairy 

Like us, we are embracing natural hair, the natural bush, and both growing out our hair.  This is a nsfw sub Reddit that has stages of women going through hair growth.  It is beautiful and sexy.  We love it!

 

r/erasernipples

This is another random subreddit we found very fun and sexy.  There are a lot of subreddits like this, very particular to what you are looking for.  If you love large nipples, like erasers, this subreddit is for you!

r/changingrooms

Selfies taken from changing rooms.  Help these ladies pick out the outfits they will be wearing that night.  Help them pick out the right panties and bra.  Or just look at them flashing their breasts while inside a changing room.

r/AsiansGoneWild

If you have followed our blog at all over the last 5 years, then you know Nessa is Asian, and Ryan loves Asian women!  Well then of course they love the subreddit of amateur Asian women sharing their bodies for fun!  Asainsgonewild is a hot spot for the Bloggs on reddit.  And if you have a thing for Asian women, this is where you will learn all about their naughty bits.

r/tipofmypenis

Are you looking for that rare porn you remember masturbating to when you were younger?  That 3 second gif that you can’t stop staring at, wanting to see more.  That video that just shows 2 minutes and nothing else?  This subreddit is the brains behind helping you find any obscure video or porn star you have ever imagined.  If these guys can’t find it, no one can.  And if you think you can do better?  Join them and make them better.  

r/stupidslutsclub

Random amateur/real stories from women all over the world that proudly slut it up.  From public sex, to gang bangs, to whatever their heart desires.  Good reads.

r/grool

Girl drool.  Say no more.  Trust me, here at Sex Life and Everything we are finding the good stuff for you.  You’re welcome.


25 More…

NSFW Reddit Gone Wild

There’s something for everyone in the sprawling corner of NSFW Reddit known as Gone Wild, or Reddit GoneWild. Here are the NSFW subreddits to start with.

1) r/GoneWild

The best-kept secret in amateur pornography on the internet. That is if you can still count it as a secret when almost a million people subscribe, and even more just pop in for a visit. Reddit GoneWild has fostered a deeply supportive community, with regulars and a dedicated pack of commenters. Reddit’s GoneWild allows people to safely explore their exhibitionist tendencies, but it’s basically just women. For readers looking to indulge in male nudity, keep reading.

 

Reddit nsfw : Amateur porn photo

 

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Deepthroating: My Experience Learning To Deepthroat w/ Video

The original video we uploaded to our xhamster actual account was deleted years ago. I hated how I looked, my weight, etc. However, the internet never forgets. We reuploaded the file for the blog.  Although not the most complimenting version of me, it is actually a few days after I learned to deepthroat.  Blog and video originally shared on ( November 9, 2012)  

I didn’t know or understand what deepthroating was the first time I heard about it.  I thought it was simply taking a dick into your mouth as far as you could, or rather, as far as your body would allow.  My husband would tell me to deepthroat him, so I’d press his dick down as hard as I can in the  back of my mouth for a few seconds and gag.  I thought if you gagged it was deepthroating.  I was happy that I could let him feel the back of my throat and show him I could gag for him.   He was happy to feel the back of my throat, and truthfully, he took pride in his dick making me gag.  Ladies, it really isn’t a necessity to learn to deepthroat, because the truth is, some men prefer to feel superior.  It’s an ego thing, and men want to conquer us in every way.  However, to deepthroat a man is conquering him.  It’s empowering.  Watching a man’s face when you make his pride and joy disappear before his very eyes and leave him with what looks like  you eating his vagina, is emasculating. But, these men, who get deepthroated, learn to pride themselves in their woman’s ability.  Their pride is transferred onto their partner being able to do what no other women could.  And, it takes a real man to realize that he met his match.   But there is much more to it. Deepthroating has become one of the most sought-after talents that I never knew I wanted to learn.

Upon researching forums asking “Can your girl deepthroat?” I’ve heard of men (and even women) calling deepthroaters “slutty” or “whores,” but these are probably men whose women are close-minded, prude, or just can’t suck their dicks right; on the other hand, a sex forum surveyed its users (please keep in mind, this is a very highly sexual group surveyed) and 1 girlfriend out of 10 in these men’s past, had this skill.   Out of their current relationships, it averaged about 9 out of the 100 men had current spouses or girlfriends who had this skill. Interesting stats, not sure how true it holds up if surveyed at a political forum or otherwise.  If this statistic were accurate, I wanted so bad to be that <10% of the talented few who could please her man.

Learning to deepthroat was a challenge for me, albeit a fun challenge.  Even before I started, my mind was ready to do it.  I just knew that I would be able to deepthroat so easily.  I knew that I would learn it quick and master it in a few minutes.  I couldn’t have been more wrong.

For my first attempt, my husband, Ryan, was laying down while I was between his legs.  Even though my mind was open and willing, my body just wasn’t on the same page.  I did a little of my normal dick sucking, stroking while only going about two inches down.  It would only be a matter of time before I go “all the way down.”  I didn’t warm myself up.  I let his head go over the area where my hard palate ended, but as soon as I did, my body went into self-preservation mode, closed up my throat, and gagged his dick out.  I didn’t realize it at the time, but thinking back, that’s exactly what happened: my throat blocked off his cock as soon as I felt like I was in “danger.”  Even with me closing off my throat, I kept trying to force his dick down, and in doing so I was hurting my throat.  I was mentally accepting to the idea of deepthroating, but I wasn’t physically accepting…yet.  Needless to say, I failed that day.  I was disappointed, but since it was only my first attempt I would chalk it up as part of the learning process.

The next day I tried a different position.  Instead of being between his legs I would be on his left side.  I hoped that the contour of his dick would work better with the angle of my throat.  In theory, this position should have worked easily.  In theory.  I started off slow, licking and sucking seductively.  It was the only thing I knew.  But like the day before, I panicked, closed off the entrance to my throat, and gag reflex kicked in again and again.  I didn’t throw up, but a little bit of stomach acid crept up my throat.  As soon as I felt this, I hastily pushed it down toward the entrance yet again.  Imagine gargling mouthwash and how you block off your throat to keep from swallowing it – the area in your mouth that the mouthwash touches is the only area his dick touched, i.e. not down my throat.  I should have learned from the previous day’s attempt that it won’t work when you’re doing it in frustration.  At this point I didn’t realize that your mind and body have to be in sync to accomplish something.

I decided to stop for a day and reassess my strategies.  What was I doing wrong?  Is my throat too small?  Is his dick too long?  Too hard?  Am I a slow learner or am I just not destined to learn this?

So the next day I wanted to try it by 69ing with me on top.  I was determined to keep looking until I found a way to get this right.  I started off how I usually do: sucking and licking, getting myself warmed up, as well as my husband.  Then I let his dick head rub my hard palate, coaxing and getting myself used to it being back so far.  My throat skin was not used to having something rub against it.  I gagged, but I pushed myself to keep going, then pulled his dick out.  I worked his head to the same spot and I gagged again.  I tried a third time, but then I started coughing and gagging.  Once I get the tickle feeling in my throat it just worsened until finally I have to stop.  Which is exactly what happened.

 

After a few weeks of trying, I was finally a little more successful.  Ryan was my male cheerleader: “That’s it…keep going a little lower…oh! Almost got it!”  His talking was making me nervous and throwing me off so I told him to be quiet and just let me work.  I closed my eyes, relaxed my throat muscles and my jaw bone, and let his dick head slowly creep onto my soft palate.  That wasn’t too bad, I thought to myself.  I pulled back and sucked and licked a bit.  After about a minute I was ready to try again.  His head glided over my soft palate again, this time getting very close to my tonsils.  I let it linger over the soft palate before finally popping it toward my uvula (the little flap of skin that hangs down that looks like a boxing speed bag) and for the first time, dipping down into my throat.  As I felt his dick hitting the back of my throat, then curve down and slide deeper into my esophagus, my husband asks, “Did you do it?  Did it go down your throat?”  Upset that he couldn’t tell, I pull up off his dick and ask, “What do you think?!”  What did I expect?  He’d never felt his dick deepthroated and I had never deepthroated.  I was so excited that I finally did it!  It happened so fast!  Once you get passed the threshold where your throat wants to reject his dick, you just have to push it back.  Like pulling a Band-Aid…you have to do it fast or you’ll feel fear and dread the entire time.

One of my biggest concerns was choking and coughing and not being able to pull his dick out in time so I end up biting down on him (which has never happened).  Feeling a cock in your throat is kind of like feeling of suspending the food in your throat.  Try it yourself.  Eat a piece of bread and swallow, but try to keep it from going down your throat.  You can’t.  Why?  Your throat muscles automatically push food down to keep your windpipe clear and allow air to pass in and out.  If you could keep food in your throat and go against your body’s reaction to keeping your throat clear, that is the feeling of deepthroating, which may be why a reason why it’s such difficult skill to learn.

During this session, I deepthroated a few times, trying to get my accustomed to this new accomplishment.  It wasn’t anything as impressive as what I do now as far as techniques.  I didn’t push my face all the down into his crotch, I didn’t do the “washing machine” technique, or any of the others that I can do now, but as they say, the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

Once I realized 69ing was the best platform to get accustomed with deepthroating, I knew I had to try that position again.  It was my best chance.  By now I’d been practicing for a few days and despite not learning to deepthroat as fast as I’d hoped, I was still determined.  I mounted my man and stuffed my mouth with his cock.  I felt my mouth getting fuller and fuller as it expanded.  I waited until he was at 80% fully erect.  I lathered up his cock with my spit and lowered my mouth down.  My confidence had been building since I believed I had already deepthroated several days before this moment.  It was muscle memory of sorts.  Was I able to do it this day?  Yes!  I felt his head pop past the soft flesh in the back of my mouth and down into my throat.  I pulled him out, and did it again. And again. And again. My husband had no doubt that this was deepthroating.  True deepthroating.  I bobbed my head faster, easier.  Not necessarily further down.  But I was doing it!  I felt Ryan stop sucking my clit as he wanted to enjoy every second his dick plunged into a place no dick has ever been.  Ryan didn’t cum; he could cum any time he wanted.  It wasn’t everyday he would feel his wife finally learn to deepthroat for the first time.

 

Continued: Deepthroating A Dildo The Size of My Forearm

 Originally posted on Nov 9, 2012.

Live Stream for Voyeurs – If These Walls Could Talk

Live Streaming for Voyeurs.  

If you want to have fun, or just interrupt, you can donate $1 or more (text to speech) and you will be able to communicate a message out loud in the room.  That could be interesting?  Donate Here

If these walls could talk…. now they can.  Although our live stream is being hosted on Chaturbate, we have our privacy settings set to where we do not show up on the listing page so only those browsing this blog will catch our voyeur streams.  Our camera is up in the ceiling and other than us being us, we do not interact with any chat rooms.  However, we have added an option for you guys here at our blog to donate $1 and let us know you are watching, or have your text-to-speech play out loud if you happen to get lucky and catch our live stream.   This is only something we are doing for the blog readers, as this option is not offered on Chaturbate. Since we are making ourselves unlisted, we will not get random viewers.  We do not make any profit on this site (no ads, no hidden miners, no random popups) and will not get rich off a single dollar donation, so no worries, you are not being hustled! We just think it would be fun to hear from a viewer live as we play with each other.  We came up with the idea to live stream (voyeur) our sex life because we originally wanted to live stream our bedroom 24 hours a day, every day.  Whether we are sleeping or getting ready for work, we just wanted to leave a camera on and just let it stream to the internet.  Unfortunately, there aren’t any platforms that we know of that allow us to record our room 24 hours a day, because this would mean it would also film us having sex, sleeping nude, and other things that may be against various platforms terms of service.  The only option we know of is a dedicated server, which can costs $100s per month.  Because our blog makes no income we do not think it would be smart to pay fees to purchase a dedicated server that can keep our room stream active each day. Therefore, we are looking into a platform to stream our day to day life, while using chaturbate to stream the “down time”.    We are still testing the waters and have no stream schedule.  If you have to catch a show, please stay positive and enjoy the show.

Extra infomation regarding Live Streaming for Voyeurs

We do not put on private shows for money and our live streaming for voyeurs is purely for our own desires to be sexhibitionists.  If you happen catch a live stream, leave a comment below and let us know.  Any negative comments will be removed.  Good positive vibes only please.  We know, we know, we are no Ken and Barbie and are just a real life couple letting random blog viewers be flies on the wall. 

Disclaimer:  We will not add pop up ads, bit miners, or any other random thing you get from various live cams.  We will not fix our camera angles (it’s a ceiling surveillance cam, true voyeur style), zoom in, show creampies or focus on our bodies or genitals, fix the lighting, or invite you or anyone over to our house to join us.  We are allowing others to view our random sex life as if they are a fly on the wall, voyeurism.  We will shut off the cameras when we are done.  If you want to comment, post below or use the TTS.